Douglas Bastard's Rants of Rage

Home of five writers who proudly sail under the banner of D. Bastard Esquire

Hating beige (and Theresa May)

How do you hate beige? I mean, it’s just a bland colour, the kind of thing you’d paint the toilet or that small room under the stairs, surrendering to a brief lapse in imagination and […]

May, 20 · in Uncategorised

Imagination

I was lucky as a kid. I was bored a lot of the time. Growing up as an only child meant that I had nobody to spar against and having parents who deemed time well […]

May, 08 · in Uncategorised

Sex

Kingsley Amis said that his waning sex drive came as a relief, as when it flowed in full spate, it was like being fettered to an idiot. I don’t quite have lengthening years to thank, […]

Apr, 24

In praise of Al Bowlly

In the thirties, opera was out of reach of most people. The grand, beautifully overblown gestures, the music that soared to a crescendo and the vaulting emotion were experiences that were for the social elite […]

Apr, 18

An open letter to Joshua D Jones

Heavens, but I’m bored of reading blogs like yours. More particularly, I’m bored of the prescriptive notions that you attach to masculinity and the repetitive zeal with which you articulate them. Men have been invited […]

Apr, 16

The Rabbit’s Easter message

My life, in the past few years, has been a gradual retreat from certainty, such that I’m no longer sure of how much of the Christian story I believe in. When I was an awful, […]

Apr, 15
Why I don’t vote

Why I don’t vote

A blog about why you don’t do something is always going to be a difficult sell, but I’m going to persevere because this something is fairly fundamental and I want to make my reasons very, […]

Apr, 14

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