Douglas Bastard's Rants of Rage


This article was written on 05 May 2016, and is filled under Uncategorised.

On voting and stupidity

Are you ready for an opinion that no politician will be brave enough to share? Here it comes. Most of the people in this country are stupid. Absolutely and utterly stupid. The have the intelligence to get up and go to work, to understand how to conceive babies and conduct human relationships on a basic level and that’s about it. You doubt me? Let’s consider the evidence and then you can decide if you’re outraged.

We’re presently governed by the Tories who were elected by 24% of the people who voted. Those people are spectacularly stupid, because their victory is clearly breaking the country’s back each day they hold power. People are suffering like never before, food banks stud the land and the gap between rich and poor is widening all the time. If you’re poor, you’re pretty much fucked and if, like me, you’re in the middle, life isn’t that much fun, either. Our best option is probably suicide, but we’re all too cowardly or allow ourselves to cling on to some faint hope that it might get better.

Moving on. There are the imbeciles who vote for UKIP who are beyond redemption. They’re so entirely stupid that anything outside Dover looks strange and fearful and if there’s one thing they’re certain of, it’s that they don’t want anything to do with them. There are some optional, ancillary views that support this central one, things like not liking anyone who isn’t white, thinking that all Muslims want to rape your daughter and that English is some kind of birthright that allows you to be an absolute howling wanker without fear of censure, but they’re very much down to the conscience of the individual UKIPper. Anyway. They’re all vastly stupid.

The LibDems are, of course, profoundly stupid, because their party enabled the first term of Cameron’s awfulness and voting for more of the same beggars belief. Their party outed themselves as Tory Lite by cheerily nodding along with every piece of right wing stupidity and somehow thinking that people would see them as statesmen rather than just absolute careerist cretins who wanted to get their hands a little bit closer to the levers of power. To see how that worked, just ask Vince Cable. So utterly fuckwittish that he allowed himself to be tricked by two female journalists posing as members of the public and then became laughably bullish about his policies, the dunderheaded Cable traded it all for a job title, kissed his credibility a fond goodbye and lost the next election to the kind of dead-eyed Tory fembot that seems to come from a laboratory somewhere in Berkshire. These too are fools.

We now come to the Labour Party. The only hope anyone in this country has of escaping this mess is living in Scotland, so if anyone north of the border votes Labour, a unionist party, then they should be sectioned for their own good. South of the border, the picture gets more complicated. There’s no realistic alternative to voting Labour, as I’ve explained above, at least not since the Green Party decided the population could be divided up into ‘men’ and, quite bizarrely, ‘non men’ so I suppose that, if I was the voting kind, that’s who I’d have to vote for. That said, the party contains Blairites who have have the support of failed human beings like David Aaronovitch and that absolute skidmark John Rentoul, so if we said that around half of them are absolute gibbering morons, we’re probably getting somewhere close.

Then there are the non-voters. This category includes me, so I need to be a bit circumspect about what I say, but I got here because I engaged, got disillusioned by Blair and then gave up entirely. If you got here because you’ve never even bothered to vote or don’t know the name of your MP, then that’s the last word in contemptibility. In fact, I almost hope that there’s a law passed which makes it legal for people who don’t know the name of their MP can be beaten to death on a random basis so that when they start being thrashed and complain, their assailant can rightly claim that it’s entirely legal. But let’s be charitable here. Let’s say that half of all non-voters are idiots.

That leaves a country of absolute howling fuckwits by any reasonable definition. Between the death of hope, the homeless Blairites, the Tories and the idiocy of the Greens, this is a political system that, stem to stern, has been comprehensively bollocksed up. Look at wider society and you’ll start to see that bollocksing things up happens when you have so many stupid people in your electorate. We have a monarchy nobody voted for that gets given an obscene amount of money, children being tested in a way that places them under the kind of pressure that I’d wilt under, privatised trains nobody can afford, insane house prices, austerity and a fucked economy. And we’re supposed to nod our heads to choose someone who would do bugger all about any of that? No thanks.

With a stupid electorate, you get a stupid country that does stupid things. I can’t change that with my vote, were I to use it. Let the stupid people go on doing stupid things and just don’t, I pray, bother me. Today has seen an awful lot of people on Twitter do what Twitter does best, and that’s allow people to whip themselves up into an absolute frenzy of convincing themselves that they’ve just voted for a brave new tomorrow and, in the case of Londoners, spat in the eye of Zac Goldsmith. They haven’t. Life goes on regardless, the country goes its own stupid way and the dawn will still break tomorrow. Over a stupid, stupid country.

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